Wednesday, 15 September 2010

Alfa Romeo Giulietta

I don't know if you've ever seen Italian TV, but a large number of programs involve women in bikinis, jiggling. To see what I mean, you can always search on Youtube for Hole in the Wall. In the UK, we got silver men in silver jumpsuits. In Italy, they get scantily clad women.

The Italisn men we see in the media in the UK are generally older, fatter and greyer than British men. It's probably not fair to base a national steretype on two men named Flavio and Silvio, but that's who this car is designed for. 

You see, both of them are known for having a taste for young, pretty women. In bikinis. They like smooth sleek curves. They look like men who would drive Ferraris. And when they break down, as they invariably will, it's fine, because their helicopters will arrive shortly to pick them up.

But the problem is, with so many young, beautiful women on the go, it would be bankrupting to buiy each and every one of them a Ferrari. So Ferrari's parent company have developed a solution. The Alfa Giulietta.

This car is extremely nice. It is an Alfa, and you can see much of the Alfa design philosophy at the front. It is clearly aimed at women, hence the name - there is no man on earth who could pull off driving a car called a Giulietta.

But women generally won't buy this car. Any women I know who are into cars would spend the money on getting a more powerful car, or a convertible, because a hatchback is just a bit naff. It's expensive, at £19,000 for a car slightly bigger than a Golf. Women generally buy cars using their head, not their heart, but with men it's the other way round. 

So mature, sensible women probably aren't going to buy this. What about young, reckless women? No, probably not. The difference in cost could quite easily be spent on, say, Buckfast, or thousands of bikinis from Primark. 

And parents buying for their children? No way. It is simply too big a price difference to make it feasible as a car to buy for a daughter. Or a son. Unless you hate him.

So it won't appeal to men, older women, younger women or parents. But there is one market that this could be sold to.

And that brings me to my earlier point. If you weren't paying for it, and you were a young and attractive woman who needed to attend champagne and canape receptions in style to be seen with your aging sugar daddy, this is perfect. The Giulietta is a diamond pendant, an adornment that an older woman would find tacky but a younger woman would be quite happy to receive as a gift, but out of the price range of someone in their own age range. This is a car for wealthy men to buy for their younger, more attractive women who won't be there in 6 months time. This is a car for Silvio.

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